in class i’m used to sitting in the back and making all these smartass comments under my breath
now i’m in the front though so when our attractive instructor drops something and says ‘ah, fuck me!’ and i say ‘maybe later’ he hEARS ME AND LAUGHS GODFUCKING FUCK
the saga continues today in physics when our instructor asks ‘and how fast does light travel?’ and i whisper ‘hella’ and the kid next to me fucking loses it
THIS CAT IS ASKING TO BE PETTED IT IS ACTUALLY ASKING THIS IS THE MOST POLITE CAT IN THE WORLD AND IT’S GOING TO KILL ME
This is painfully accurate.
Quote reblogged from with 133,055 notes
I think once you’ve thought about how a person sleeps, how they’d feel pressed up against your back, or your head on their chest, how compatible your bodies would be in the same space of a bed — once you’ve thought about that, you’re fucked.
*opens window and screams* AM I MORE THAN YOUVE BARGAINED FOR YET I’VE BEEN DYING TO TELL YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT TO HEAR CAUSE THATS JUST WHO I AM THIS WEEK
HUMAN!!!! HUMAN!!!! STOP!!!! I’M DRY!!!! STOP THE AIR BLOWY WOOSHY WOOSHY!!! I’M DRY!!!! I’M DONE!!!!
I love him, he’s literally trying to talk to her rather than bite or anything aggressive aaahh babies dogs are the best
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